March 02, 2006

Mutated Viral Strand Turns Locals Into Zombies

Make sure you go to the doctor and get your flu shots this season. A new variation of the flu bug is causing catastrophic calamities. The new bug has made its way into the general populations. Isolated incidents have only been reported so far but the national medical community urges all citizens to get vaccinated as soon as possible to contain what they consider a small threat.

Or so the national health committees want us to believe. For years patients have been encouraged to get flu shots for the last 10 years and each year the suggestion gets a little stronger. Why?

Word on Internet conspiracy sights point to the use of a potent influenza strain as a biological weapon. But this reporter dug deeper for the truth. The new strain, identified only as Z-B5, is a mutation of the flu virus with unknown origins. One thing has been confirmed, the outcome. Sufferers of this non-lethal but still very dangerous drug turn into zombies.

That’s right, zombies, those walking shells of loved ones controlled by a hidden master to be used as mindless slaves. Only, who is the master? Some conspiracies point to government involvement. I would agree but such blatant disregard for public safety seems just a tad too irresponsible.

No. I say this conspiracy lies in the region of the supernatural bloodsuckers, those vampires that have wormed their way into every facet of existence. This reporter intends to keep a close eye on those malevolent undead fiends whose violent rise to power started in the criminal underworld and stretched tentacles into legitimate enterprise as well.

Posted by Nicole Vigil at March 2, 2006 03:11 PM
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